Why Americans Prefer Life in Italy

Expats discuss why they’ve made Italy their home: “It’s the texture of life.”

Kirsten Powers’ recent article, “The way we live in the United States is not normal: Why we are buying land in Italy,” hit home for many readers in America, where I am from, and for expats in Italy, where I now live. I must have been forwarded the story by at least ten people right after it was published. After Italian friends expressed surprise at the idea of increasing numbers of Americans choosing to relocate to Italy, I convened a group of expats to discuss not only why we first came here, but why—even when the opportunity to move back arises—we opt to stay. This discussion, which was adapted from an Italian version for B-Hop Magazine, has been lightly edited, and is not meant to speak for the varied situations and motivations of other expats.

From left: Cristina, Laura, Deanna, June and David

June: When Italians hear my accent they ask, “Why would you leave America and come here? My response to them is I've lived in both places. And I just have to say that the texture and quality of life here is far superior.

June has lived in Italy since 1981. Originally arriving to work as a journalist, she never left.

June: I cannot believe what a beautiful country we live in. The first time I came, the beauty just overwhelmed me. It brought me back. And the smells, the tastes, the people…

Judy: Yes, the beauty, the lack of pollution, the fascinating history. Plus you live life, you enjoy life.

Judy and her partner David are at the center of the large expat community in Trevignano Romano. She has lived in Italy for five decades, working in the foreign service, then as a journalist and writer. David, a long-time BBC correspondent, considers himself one of the original digital nomads.

David: There’s a humanity about people here. When you talk to people, they are genuine. The sense of community is extraordinary. You circulate among your contemporaries, many of whom are foreigners, like you are, but many of whom are not foreign. We go almost every day down to the local bar, where we have close friends who come from all over.

Cristina: It’s not just the sense of community, but also the sense of communion.

Cristina is American, of Italian heritage. Now living in Rome for the second time in the last ten years, she is a cybersecurity expert who has worked in government and the tech sector.

Cristina: It’s the daily rhythm of life in Italy that doesn't really exist in America. Everybody's kind of on their own schedule, on their own rhythm. When I went back to the U.S. after working here for five years, what I missed were just those daily moments of communion, like the morning coffee, going out for lunch or afternoon coffee with your coworkers…. Where I worked in Washington D.C., people would heat up their lunch in the microwave, eat at their desk, and keep working. Here at first I thought it was weird—why does everybody have to have lunch at exactly 1:30? You go a little earlier, a little later, but it's a chance for people to be together because everybody's on the same schedule. When I went back to the U.S. before moving here again, it was really hard for me to get used to the isolation. 

Laura: I think the main difference is that people here love to live. They don't live to work. They live to enjoy themselves. 

Laura is an Italian American visual artist who recently moved back after 40 years in the US.

Laura: In Italy, work is secondary. In the United States, you work, work, work, even Saturday, even Sunday, even at night. But here, like Cristina said, you still take a break for coffee, you lunch together, you take a walk. And then you invent something and you create something together. You don't have to make an appointment to see people. 

Cristina: Yes, in American urban life, as a young professional you have to schedule with friends far in advance. And always at the last minute people will cancel because of work. I would organize a dinner for say, 10 people, and if I was lucky, maybe 6 would show up in the end. Whereas when I moved to Rome, I would invite 10 people and 15 would show up! That was shocking to me. Or just the idea that I could call a friend and say, “Hey I’m in your neighborhood, want to grab a coffee?”

Laura: There is a lot more flexibility and spontaneity, but in the end it always comes down to “Okay, where are we going to eat?” And you go to a local trattoria, but you don’t get drunk.

June: It is a much more natural part of life, drinking—not a rite of passage like it is when young people reach the drinking age in the States. Just drink a glass of wine, and that’s it.

David: The Italian bar is a much more complex institution than, say, the English pub, which in my day mainly served alcohol. It wasn’t where everyone—mothers, children—met for a coffee and talk…

June: And for moments of connection.

Everyone agreed that they would have nowhere near the quality of life they have here if they lived in the U.S., largely because of the cost of living—not just the cost of buying a home or feeding a family, but for what author Kirsten Powers calls the “‘entitlements’ in the United States [that] are rightly understood as human rights” in Italy.

June: All my very close friends in the States, and some of them are artists, some are lawyers, they all make a fairly good living, but they're worried about money all the time. They're scared of retirement…they're scared to death of everything. 

Judy: When my mother got cancer and had to be hospitalized, I went back to the U.S. She was paying $1,000 a day for a room in a hospital. $1,000 a day! And that was decades ago. I realized I would never be able to pay that kind of money, not even with insurance.

David: When Judy inherited a car and house, she found a job. But she did the whole calculation very carefully and found she would have a very uncertain future. Basically, she couldn’t afford to stay in America. In Italy, I’ve had wonderful health care. I’ve had serious heart surgery. I paid nothing for it.

June: We are extremely lucky here that we are covered for everything that could happen. The other day my husband and I were in a car accident and were taken to the hospital. I had x-rays done, and that was it. You paid nothing. You did nothing. They said “you are free to go.” 

Cristina: There’s not even a place to pay! When I broke my arm and went to the emergency room, I said, “Where do I pay? Where’s the register, the reception, to pay?” And my Italian friend was like, “What are you even talking about?”

June: The other thing that I think is a major difference between here and the States is people living on credit card debt. I don’t know anyone there who doesn’t have some debt. Here, it’s hard to even get a credit card that you pay off over time. People tend to have  debit or prepaid cards. And then there’s the expense of college. [Tuition at public universities in Italy ranges from about $650 to $3200.]

Laura: Also, the United States is so dangerous. I don’t feel safe there. I’ve escaped because I felt threatened. On the street I wouldn’t look people in the eyes like I do here. And you see people carrying guns! It’s crazy. So one of the main reasons I came back is because I want to be at peace. I want to enjoy life. Of course, for young people, maybe the United States is still better for finding a job. Because in Italy, bureaucracy is still very difficult and for young people, even if you have a great mind to make something, to build something, you have to go through so many hoops. In fact, a lot of great minds go abroad. Maybe when you get older, Italy and Europe is much better because of the lifestyle, the climate, the health care and so much more. 

June: My daughter is 100% Italian in her being. And yet she realizes that for the world that she wants to move up in, the world of TV and film development, that is the place to be, in California. But she would love to be able to do what she wants, and find the balance between the quality of life here, and the quality of work and salary that she can get there. My sister on the other hand is very high-powered, a New Yorker, but she’s come here often and now says “I could see myself here.” She is thinking of spending at least six to eight months of the year here for love of the quality of life, the texture of Italian life.

David: We spent a fortnight with Judy's daughter in Los Angeles. And I observed their life there. They live in a beautiful house in a leafy suburb…but every drive is a minimum of an hour, and often it's two. Whenever Judy calls her daughter, she's sitting in the car. I said, do you spend your life sitting in the car? 

Judy: In order to do anything, you have to jump into a car. 

Cristina: And again, it's so isolating. At least here, you hop on a train…

David: You get your coffee at the bar at the railway station…

Cristina: And you feel like you’re part of life! This may be my single favorite thing about Italy, a wonderful train system. You can explore all of these amazing places cheaply and easily and stress-free. I wish the U.S. had that. There’s no reason why when I would have to go from New York to Washington D.C. my employer encouraged us to take a plane because it was cheaper, even with the cost of a taxi to the airport, than to take a so-called high-speed train, which was always late and incredibly expensive. I mean, I can get up in the morning and be in Florence in an hour and a half, and in Venice by lunchtime [at about $37 for one way on a high-speed train].

David: It is literally quite, quite extraordinary to be living in a place which was going strong for 2000 years, with ups and downs, but with the depth of cultural achievement which you see all over. My introduction to Italy was through Venice, one of the wonders of the world. And then you discover one by one, bit by bit, Naples…

June: Naples, it's like Alice going into Wonderland. It's like a whole other sense of time and space in how people are treating you and laughing with you. 

David: And what about Sicily? What about Orvieto? What about Florence? What about Genoa? What about Caprarola, just up the road here? 

June: The minute I set my eyes on Italy, I fell in love. I just completely fell in love with it. I had no idea where my life was going to take me. And here I am, still.

Laura: Italy is great. I mean, there are things here that need to be done better, let's say. There are problems. But the place is beautiful. There is spontaneity in life, and I feel so relaxed. I live in a historic area and I go out, everyone is so friendly, and they do not ask “What do you do?” In the U.S. people identify themselves by what they do. I am an engineer, so this is who I am. But that is not true. That's the job that you do. Who you are is something else. What do you want? Are you happy? You need to look into yourself, and we can do that here.

from left: Judy, David, Cristina and Laura